50 Things Only FIFO Workers Understand

No context needed. No explainer up top. If you work FIFO, you already know. If you do not, this list is not going to help.

Fifty things. Short. From inside the donga, not from a desk in Perth.

1. The countdown app on your phone has more screen time than Instagram.
2. You have eaten the same chicken schnitzel 47 times and you will eat it again tomorrow.
3. Your partner runs the house better when you are not there and you both know it.
4. You have had a full conversation about rosters that lasted 45 minutes.
5. The first beer on R&R hits different. Nothing in science can explain how different.
6. You own more hi-vis than civilian clothes and you see nothing wrong with this.
7. The donga aircon has two settings: arctic and broken.
8. You have a hi-vis tan that looks like you are wearing a permanent singlet.
9. Someone on your crew has been doing FIFO for 15 years and talks about quitting every single swing.
10. You can tell what day of the swing it is by the mess hall menu without checking.
11. The charter flight is the only plane where nobody claps on landing because everyone is asleep.
12. You have unpacked your FIFO bag the same way, in the same order, in 30 different dongas.
13. Your phone alarm says 3:45am and your body does not even flinch anymore.
14. The gym at 9pm after a 12-hour shift is the loneliest, most honest place on earth.
15. You have sent a text that just says "3 more sleeps" and everyone in your life knows what it means.
16. The wet mess on a Friday night is either dead silent or an episode of a show that would never get commissioned.
17. You know what a pre-start is and you have slept through one standing up.
18. Your idea of meal prep is walking to the mess hall slightly earlier than yesterday.
19. The bus from the airport to site is the longest 90 minutes of your life.
20. You have Googled "FIFO divorce rate" at 2am and immediately closed the tab.
21. Your kids drew a picture of the family and you are a stick figure on a plane.
22. The safety induction video is the same at every site and you could narrate it from memory.
23. You have a nickname on site that nobody at home has ever heard.
24. The smoko hierarchy is real. Where you sit says more about you than your job title.
25. You have perfected the art of the 6-minute phone call that covers a full week of family life.

26. Crib room banter could fill a podcast but nobody would believe it was real.
27. You have stared at the ceiling of your donga at 2am thinking about every decision you have ever made.
28. The last night of a swing you pack your bag at 6pm even though the bus is not until 5am.
29. You can identify every bloke on site by their walk from 200 metres in full PPE.
30. Your savings account looks great. Your relationship with time looks concerning.
31. You have eaten a meat pie at 5am and called it breakfast without hesitation.
32. R&R day one is sleep. R&R day two is errands. R&R day three is when you finally sit down and the guilt arrives.
33. The bloke who brings his own pillow is not soft. The bloke who brings his own pillow has been here longer than you.
34. You have watched an entire sunset alone on a mine site and it was the most peaceful and the most lonely moment of your life in the same breath.
35. Your work boots cost more than your going-out shoes and get ten times the wear.
36. You know the exact weight of your FIFO bag because you have been charged excess once and it will never happen again.
37. The first 48 hours home are beautiful and confusing in equal measure.
38. You have a roster app, a countdown app, a weather app for a town you do not live in, and three group chats named after your crew.
39. Someone in camp snores loud enough to register on seismic equipment and everyone knows which donga it is.
40. You have driven past a school at 3pm and realised you have no idea what day of the week it is.
41. The Christmas swing is either the best or the worst depending on the roster gods and there is no in between.
42. You know what "golden handcuffs" means and you have felt them tighten.
43. Your laundry routine on site could be described as "aggressive and efficient".
44. You have explained what FIFO stands for to someone and watched their face change three times.
45. The camp coffee is a human rights issue that nobody has taken to the UN yet.
46. You have missed a birthday, an anniversary, a first word, a first step, or a grand final and pretended it was fine.
47. Your suitcase has never been fully unpacked since the day you started.
48. You know what a swing feels like in your bones. Not the calendar. The bones.
49. The drive from the airport home is the best 40 minutes of your fortnight.
50. You would not trade the money but you would trade the time. That is the whole thing.

That Is the Whole Thing

Fifty things. Some funny, some not. All true. The roster keeps turning, the bus keeps showing up at 4:45, and the chicken schnitzel keeps appearing on the menu like a law of physics.

If you recognised yourself in more than a few of these, you are one of us. Not a movement. Not a campaign. Just a nod from someone who has stared at the same donga ceiling at the same hour wondering the same things.